Mamoru's Realization
by Sailor Amaranth
Summary: Mamoru overhears a conversation in the arcade which makes him seriously reconsider his feelings for Usagi.


The mighty Chiba Mamoru would not back down. He was a straight A student at a prestigious Tokyo medical college, had had test papers, shoes, and various other things thrown his way with deadly precision by the Odango Atama, survived daily head-on collisions with said Odango , and was Tuxedo Kamen, for Pete's sake! He could handle this!

_Then why are you still sitting here like a coward?, _his evil inner voice taunted.

Mamoru snorted. He was not a coward, he was simply gathering his thoughts. Yes, that's it, simply ensuring that everything he said would be cool, suave, sophisticated, and…

"Delicious!", came an overexcited voice on his left.

He turned around to notice none other than Tsukino Usagi smacking her lips after finishing one of Motoki's famous hot chocolates. "Could I have another please, Motoki-onee-chan?", she asked, batting her eyes flirtatiously as she did so.

Motoki smiled at the girl he thought of as a cute kid sister. "Sure, Usagi-chan! One hot chocolate coming up!"

Usagi giggled like a school girl at Motoki's antics. Mamoru could feel a vein on the side of his head popping. Why did she always lavish such affectionate attention on his best friend!?

_Maybe because he's actually NICE to her. Something you should try. In fact, wasn't that your whole purpose in coming in her today, mmm? Because you're going to ask her out before what's-his-name does?_

True, that _was_ the whole reason Mamoru was skipping his afternoon classes. On his last visit to the arcade, he had heard a group a guys wearing Juuban Middle School uniforms egging on their friend to finally ask out his crush. Mamoru had chuckled at their conversation, remembering acting the same way towards Motoki when he realized he and Reika would make a cute couple. However, the next sentence he heard made him spit his coffee on Motoki's ever pristine counter.

"Ok! Ok! You're right. I will ask Tsukino-san out to the dance next time I see her. I don't think I could stand it if she went with someone else".

_WHAT!? _ Mamoru had jumped off his stool and had made it halfway to the punk before he realized what he was doing. He was actually going to go over there and give them a piece of his mind, explaining in not too kindly words, that Odango Atama was HIS and that NO ONE else, especially not a geeky looking middleschooler, had any right to ask her ANYWHERE.

Of course, that's when reality came crashing down again on Mamoru and he came to the conclusion that Motoki must have laced his daily java with something to make him this homicidal, especially towards a random school boy who was unfortunate enough to think that he would actually enjoy spending more than five minutes in the presence of Tokyo's biggest klutz and most annoying blonde bimbo ever to grace its sidewalks.

With that decided he settled back down on his stool, ignoring the questioning glances shot his direction at his unusual behavior. Raking his hand through his lavish black locks, he sighed and decided he was not going to worry about the whole incident and finish drinking his coffee (which he conveniently forgot to think of as doped) and finish reading the required chapter for his Advanced Microbiology class. But of course, the ever logical Mamoru couldn't just make up dumb excuses and ignore something as monumental as his strange outburst, and so he found his thoughts drifting to an analysis of the situation.

_A random school boy wants to ask Odango, the bane of my ordered existence, to a school dance. Then I become enraged and attempt to hurt said boy. But that would mean…I'm JEALOUS!? Of Odango Atama going to a dance with another boy!? But that would mean…I would prefer her for to go out with me. Why on earth would I want klutzy, crybaby, below-average intelligence Odango to go out with me? Unless, of course, I…love…her. _

Mamoru's mouth fell open and his eyes widened at shock at his revelation. _How the HELL did that happen!?, _he thought angrily. He had promised himself that he would never fall in love with anyone, because the rejection or loss of that special person would be too much for him to bear. He had already lost his entire family at the tender age of six, and the idea of going through such emotional turmoil again scared the daylights out him. He would much rather live with friends at arm's length rather than risk heartache. So how exactly had he fallen in love?

And why Usagi? She had so many negative qualities and she was such a child. But as Mamoru reflected on this, he realized that Usagi had an overwhelming amount of good qualities that far outweighed the bad. Usagi loved everyone and everything. Her smile lit up any room she walked into and any person she encountered. She was willing to do anything for her friends, and the friends she made were those that most people shunned. Mamoru thought about Umino and Naru, two people who definitely fit the description of nerd, quiet Ami, who was constantly excluded because of her keen intellect, fiery Rei, who most people considered rather creepy for her psychic abilities, street-wise Makoto, who inadvertently frightened others her age with her considerable strength and past history, and bubbly Minako, whose past as a model caused extreme fits of jealously from other girls. None of these things bothered Usagi. She saw potential friends, not social outcasts. She was always willing to lend a helping hand and her vivacious attitude toward life was contagious.

_Then why do you treat her like she's dirt beneath your shoes?, _he asked himself.

Mamoru sighed again. Why did her treat her so horribly? Why did he always feel the need to put her down a notch?

_Probably because you're jealous of her light._, his ever present conscious informed him.

Was that the reason? It was true that Mamoru had had a rather lonely life, growing up in the orphanage, and he most certainly didn't have as positive a take on life as Usagi did. With a pain in his heart, Mamoru realized that was why he teased her constantly. Usagi had a loving family, wonderful friends, and was always happy and chipper. Mamoru never had any of those things and to try to ease his pain and resentment , he attempted to make her feel a fraction of the miserliness he always carried with him.

_I don't deserve someone as wonderful as Usagi., _he though sadly.

Well, that was sure the truth and now because of that stupid boy, he would never get the chance to change the way her treated her and hope against hope that she might accept him and love him as much as he did her.

_Unless you ask her to that dance first,_ his mind snickered.

_What!? I can't ask her to some dance I know nothing about! And furthermore she would laugh in my face! The calm, cool, and collected upperclassman, asking her to a middle school dance? Yeah, that would go over real well!, _Mamoru's rational side countered.

_Usagi's not like that and you know it. Besides, if you don't ask now, you may not get another chance._

And that morbid thought was the reason why Mamoru was currently sitting in the Crown Arcade amidst a sea of giggling, gossiping middleschoolers, when he should have been in class, working up the nerve to ask out his Odango before the idiot boy from yesterday did.

This was proving to be harder than he thought.

"You know, Odango, if you keeping stuffing all that sugar down your throat, Motoki will soon have to widen the door so you can fit through it"!

_NO!, _Mamoru mentally slapped himself, _Why did I say that!?_

Usagi's smile instantly vanished and she glared cold blue daggers at him. "Mind your own business Mamoru-baka. Iam having a wonderful day and even you can't ruin it!"

Mamoru cocked an eyebrow at her. "And why is that, Odango? Is the candy store having a sale?"

_What are you DOING!? Stop it!!_

"No," said Usagi and her eyes suddenly got a dreamy look in them, "Takashi-kun asked me to the dance Friday night".

Time stopped for Mamoru. He wasn't sure whether or not scream his displeasure to the world or bang his head on Motoki's still pristine counter for his stupidity. _Of course Takashi-BAKA asked Odango to the dance at school! Why did I think he'd wait until she came to the arcade?_

In any case, Mamoru sat frozen, with a dumbfounded expression of horror on his face. This was it. Mamoru had lost his chance. It was at this moment, even more so than yesterday, that Mamoru realized just how much he loved Usagi, his Usako. With the final understanding that he could not, would never, have Usagi, his chest tightened painfully with the realization.

It took Mamoru a couple of tries before he could get out any coherent words,. "I hope..", Mamoru cleared his throat, "I hope you and Takashi-san have a wonderful time together.", he managed to choke out stiffly. As hard as it was to say, he truly meant it. If Usagi couldn't be happy with him, she deserved to be happy with someone.

Usagi stared at him strangely. "What, no insult?", she asked, "Nothing like, 'Gee, Odango, how much did you pay him to take you on a date?', or 'He must pretty desperate to ask an idiot like you out'?".

Mamoru felt guilt pool in the pit of his stomach. Normally, he probably would have said something like that, but not today.

"No Usagi-chan", he heard her gasp at the use of her name, "I'm sure there are plenty of guys who would feel real lucky to take a wonderful girl like you out on a date".

_Me included, _he finished silently to himself.

Usagi stared at him wide-eyed, a blush slowly creeping up her neck. "Really, Mamoru-san? You think that?", she whispered hesitantly.

Mamoru smiled tenderly at her. "Of course, Usagi-chan. I'm terribly sorry if I ever made you think otherwise about yourself. You should never think badly about yourself. You're a wonderful person with lots of light, and I'm willing to bet that any guy who gets a chance to go out with you would count himself more than blessed".

Usagi was now staring at him in complete shock with her mouth hanging open. "Th, th, thank you Mamoru-san," she swallowed nervously, "That really means a lot to me".

She looked down at the ground and scuffed her shoe to the ground. "I didn't feel so bad about turning Takashi-kun down, because I figured there's plenty of other better girls than he could ask instead, but now that you've said that, maybe I was too insensitive to how he really felt?", Usagi finished peeking shyly at him from underneath her lashes.

It was Mamoru's turn for his eyes to widen in shock. "You turned him down?", he asked, managing to keep his voice from sounding like a high pitched squeak.

Usagi nodded. "Takashi-kun is nice and all, but I don't know him very well and I've only ever seen him as a friend. Going on a date with him would be kind of awkward for me.", she sighed, "But it was still really nice to know that someone thought enough of me to ask".

Mamoru felt like ever gift-giving holiday had arrived on the same day. If this had been a musical, Mamoru would feel no embarrassment about doing a tap dance number right on top of the counter.

"Usagi-chan, would you…", he began, but then that idiot rational part of his brain began screaming at him again.

_What are you doing? She just said it would awkward to go the dance with Takashi, what makes you think it would be less awkward for her to go with you? _

_Well, that may be true. But she knows me better and we don't necessarily have to go on a date date. At the rate I'm going, I'd be thrilled just to go as her friend._

"Would I what, Mamoru-san?", asked quietly with a spark of…was that hope?...in her eyes.

"Would you…would you like to go the dance with me instead?", Mamoru managed to choke out. "I mean, it doesn't have to be a date if you don't want. I could just go as your partner so you don't have to go alone".

Usagi stared at him for a moment and slowly smiled. "And what if I want it to be a date?", she asked.

Mamoru felt his cheeks flame up. He didn't word that very well, did he?

"Well, um, if you want it to be a date, I mean, what I'm trying to say is…", he haltingly stuttered.

Usagi smirked. "It the great Chiba Mamoru blushing and tongue-tied?", she giggled.

Mamoru felt his embarrassment fade away into anger. She was making fun of him?!

But then suddenly Usagi blushed and started scuffing her shoes on the floor again. " I would like it to be a date, if you want it to be, that is".

Mamoru couldn't believe his ears. She _wanted _to go on a date with him? After the way he treated her?

"Usagi-chan, are you sure?", he asked gently, "I mean, I haven't treated you very well, you know".

"I know that very well, Mamoru-baka!", she hotly retorted, but then her voice softened. "But I also know why you did it, so I can forgive you".

Mamoru eyebrows shot up. "You know why I did it?", he asked, incredulous.

Usagi nodded solemnly. "You're really lonely, aren't you Mamoru-san? You must have lost a parent or someone equally dear to you, since you constantly push everyone away from you. It didn't take me long to realize that about you, but when I did…well, it made your teasing easier to bear".

Mamoru felt himself beginning to choke up and the ice around his heart began to melt. He gathered Usagi up in his arms, ignoring her squeak of protest. "Usagi-chan…Usako,", he felt he stiffen at the pet name, "I am SO sorry for everything I put you through. It wasn't right of me, no matter how lonely or painful my past was. And I thank my lucky stars that someone with as big a heart as yours was insightful enough to look past that and care for me anyway".

"Oh, Mamoru!", she gasped, "I didn't tell you that to make you feel guilty, I'm sorry, I…"

He cut off with a kiss to her forehead. He smiled at the cute blush that stained her cheeks as she stared up at him with her gorgeous soulful eyes.

"Sshh. I know you didn't, and that's what makes you so special Usako. You're willing to forgive people so easily, even your own personal tormenter."

Usagi giggled slightly. "Well, you weren't _that _bad, really". After squirming under his pointed stare she snapped, "Ok, ok, you were, but…I actually kind of liked being called Odango Atama. Its kinda…cute".

He smiled. "Really, well I'll have to keep calling you that then, wont I Odango?".

She pouted at him and made a face. "Actually, I think I prefer Usako".

He laughed. "So do I, but there's no law against having two pet names".

She gazed up at his face and blushed again. "No, I guess not. "

Mamoru had never felt happier than he did at that moment. She was HIS now, and only his, and no one would take her away from him again.

He wasn't exactly sure how to take the conversation from there, but looking at her adorable pouting lips gave him an idea. He gently wrapped his arm around Usagi's waist and pulled her closer against him.

"What are….", Usagi asked confusedly, before a pair of tender, soft lips met her own.

Mamoru felt a wonderful warmth wash over him as he gently kissed Usagi. She tasted like the sweet chocolate she had just drunk and Mamoru found it very addicting. But he didn't want to frighten her, since he could tell be way she had stiffened that this was her first kiss, so he kept it chaste and reluctantly pulled away from her.

Usagi slowly opened her and languidly gazed at Mamoru. That kiss had been amazing! It only lasted for a few seconds, but it had been everything Usagi had ever dreamed of in a kiss. The sweet warmth, the melting feeling, the weakness in the knees…Usagi smiled blissfully.

That is, until she heard the sound of china breaking.

Mamoru and Usagi were suddenly pulled out of their own little world and jerked around to the source of the noise.

Motoki stood there with his eyes bugged out, his chin hanging down, and a broken mug of hot chocolate staining his not-so-pristine counter.

"Usagi! Mamoru! How...what…?", was all he could manage in his complete shock.

Usagi giggled again. "Guess, you never expected us to get together, huh Onee-chan?"

Motoki slowly recovered from his shock. "Well, _of course, _I expected you to get together. It was so obvious you had a thing for each other. I just thought for sure it'd take my super match-making skills or a miracle from heaven for it to ever happen".

He smirked seeing the new couple's dumbfounded expressions.

"You..you _knew?_ Before I did? How is that even possible? I myself didn't know until yesterday!", Mamoru gasped.

Motoki grinned. "What kind of best friend would I be if I didn't notice something that important?"

Mamoru shook his head. _Note to self: Next time I don't understand myself, ask Motoki. He's apparently omnipotent._

"Sorry about your hot chocolate Usagi-chan. I'll make you another".

"Actually, I was thinking that Usako and I could go to my place and watch a movie or something. I make killer hot chocolate too, you know".

Usagi blushed again and nodded her head. "I'd like that Mamo-chan. I'd also like to know why you just discovered your feelings for me yesterday".

Mamoru grinned sheepishly. "Ah, I think I'll wait to be in the privacy of my apartment before I tell you that".

And with that, Mamoru gently took Usagi by the hand and escorted her back to his place, where Usagi couldn't stop laughing at Mamoru's homicidal tendencies. That is, until Mamoru shut her up in a very effective manner. Needless to say, they never did get to that movie.

Takashi sat with his mouth open in shock, even minutes after the whole scene had played out.

"How did you _know?_", he demanded of the blonde sitting in the booth with him.

Minako just grinned cheekily. "What kind of best friend would I be if I didn't notice something that important?", she asked, mimicking Motoki's earlier statement.

Takashi shook his head. "No, I mean, how did you know that if I said aloud in the arcade that I wanted to take Usagi-chan to the dance, that Mamoru-san would get jealous and rethink his feelings for her and then want to ask her out the next day? And to top it off, how did you know that Usagi-chan would refuse when I asked her?"

Minako smirked. "I'm just super awesome like that, I guess".

_And being the Goddess of Love doesn't hurt either, _she giggled silently.


End file.
